The Innocent Hookers

I was born in purity 
I know nothing about the reality 
I grew up and learned what was thought to me 
My parents are there 
My brothers and sisters are there 
I was creating my world around me with them
Learning the things they thought 
Behaving the way they want 
I was becoming what they want
My mind is small 
My life was molded 
I wanted to be what they want

For me right and wrong is what they thought 
I was thought only about money 
How to get it the way they want 
I followed their way trusting them 
Thinking it’s just the normal way

I drink and take everything they gave 
I followed their way all my life 

I was working in a club since 9
I was fed with alcohol and ecstasy since a child
They thought me how to dance 
They thought me how to sing
They thought me how to be kind 
They thought me how to make others fall in love 
They thought me how to trap others 
They thought me how to make money with them 
I was told that’s the life I should be living 

I meet my parents often 
They told me to follow my boss
They are happy and hug me when I come with money 
My boss is so kind 
If I need anything I just have to tell my boss
If my parents get sick or my brothers get sick 
But I have no worries , because my boss take care of them well
I was helped all along my life 
My boss gave my father a Cycle , my family a house
Only thing I have to do is follow my boss

I wake up at night , I sleep at light 
Darkness is only thing i saw in my life 
The stars for me Are the lights which is so fast 
Which when I get high it creates my world 
The sound I hear is only the music 
The sound of music is the bridge to my world 
I take the pills and shake my head
The darkness around me shift to the world I live 
I want to stay there forever 
I don’t know what is going around me once I am  in my world 
When I wake up I am always on the bed 
Sometimes I can walk sometimes I cannot 
I feel dizzy and happy 
My feelings are mixed 
If I see the sun I just want to sleep 

My job is so exciting 
I get all what I want 
My parents are happy 
I just need the pills and drinks 
Because thats the only way I can live in my world

I don’t care about my body 
I was thought it was a tool
I was thought it is for others 
I was thought I live for my family
I was thought Allah is my god 
I was thought this is the only life we all have 
I was thought to say bismillah before Everything I do
I was thought to say Alhamdulihllah after I am done 
I was told  that I will go to heaven 
I was told to make customers happy 

Many people come to see me
I was like a doll in the display 
I just have to dance and sleep with them 
I get money the way My Boss wants 
I just have to use my brain to get dizzy and drunk 
I just have to use my brain to make them dizzy too
The more I sell the more I get ,
I always wish I had two body
I am happy and they are happy 
It was the life which was thought to live 

Until one Day I shook my head with the pills but I could not enter the world I live 
The music was there 
Lights are there 
Everything around me is normal
I thought what was wrong with me 
Because I could not go in to the world I live 

My body  get tired 
My stomach start paining 
I was getting sick often 
My boss told me I am expired and fired 
I was send back to my family but I had a debt which I never knew 
My family blamed me 
They were angry at me 
They asked me to settle everything 
It was big , I have to pay it 
Which i have no idea 
But my body no longer can work in a club anymore 
The pills and drinks has destroyed me 
It has damaged my brain and body 
Now I have no choice but to use my knowledge which I have on the street 
I became an icon on the WeChat
Now I work every night 
But with no lights and sound 
Until now I realised I am a hooker 
I think of how I became one 
Because I was told I was a dancer 
I still have no answer for my question 
I end up with a debt which i never knew 
I end up life in a question mark why my life is like this 
My parents told me to get Marry and get a child 
If it’s a girl I am lucky 
Just teach what I know 
And the child which I get will help me to settle 

I could not believe it but it is the reality 
The circle of life in Indonesia is like this 
It keeps on passing there is no end 

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